Sunday, May 10, 2009

Prepare for another pandemic...

I was soooo excited to receive notice that I can now bill the State for Plan B without a prescription. Yes!! Everyone on Welfare gets to fuck irresponsibly and for free! See...now these Welfare-ites (who don't work and obviously have lots of extra time on their hands for fucking) can come in and get unlimited quantities of not just condoms, but unlimited quantities of Plan B (about $50.00 retail). I guess I should be really happy that these individuals are going to be less likely to increase the size of their litter (which you and I are forced to pay for)...and maybe get lucky enough to take it in succession enough times to throw a clot (oh...I didn't mean that...wait...yes I did....).

It occurs to me that maybe the State may be trying to increase revenue to Pharmacies...back-door style... See, these Welfare-ites are not going to use condoms now (condoms are tricky...they don't come with a users manual...and, even if they did most of those Welfare-ites wouldn't be able to read the instructions anyway...that's why they each have about 6 in their litter...). This is like a Carnival; have unprotected sex and your prize is free Plan B. What the State isn't doing is providing "Sex-Ed" (yes I know they gave us that in Junior High...but how many of your Welfare-ites made it to Junior High? Yeah...that's what I thought...)...so these people are now going to be the "STD petri-dish" of society and we get to dispense all their antibiotics.

So...I'm beefing up the antibiotic stock in my Pharmacy in preparation for the new Pandemic that's going to put Swine Flu to shame...the "Stupid Fucker" Pandemic.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thats awesome. We better start stocking up on 1 gram zithromax packs and flagyl for the impending VD pandemic. Oh wait, the welfare kiddies already have a VD pandemic, they are called neglected children.

I pray every night for a VD that leaves one sterile after getting it. So far that's not happening.

"Ms. Mean" said...

Hahahaha! Sterile? LOL! These people are like reproductive superheros...they're immune!!

Anonymous said...

When a woman comes in for an Rx for Clomid, I feel like saying "just go on welfare, you'll be knocked up in no time!"

James said...

Oh, but condoms DO come with a users manual. If you tear the box open so that it lies flat, there are illustrations and captions explaining how to put on the condom and how to avoid making mistakes.