Cougars Amongst Us...

I have a new intern (my first is in China right now...due back in a couple weeks). He's great...smart, eager to learn, empathetic, kind...fresh meat to my evil patients. I do my best to keep him challenged because I remember a few preceptors treating me as nothing more than a machine to count by fives or answer the phone...challenging him every day has become my biggest challenge. When the hell did these students get so smart?

These two interns make me remember when everything was new and I was going to change the world...make every asshole patient feel ashamed when I showed them kindness and concern...make Physicians see my worth as a colleague...make everyone see the error in their ways and how they perceive Pharmacists and Pharmacy in general. Where did all those visions of grandeur go? I wonder when the delusions about my influence subsided...I don't remember it...it's sort of like just gradually realizing that Santa doesn't exist. I don't want to get sucked too deep into this and lose my sense of humor (and possibly my sarcasm - that would be catastrophic) but I sort of miss really believing that I could make a difference (and the presents from Santa...) and that my patients and fellow colleagues respect me. I hope my two precious Cougars don't lose this...it really is beautiful and refreshing...and gives me transient moments of hope.

That said...it occurs to me that perhaps internships aren't really about what we can teach our students but rather what our students can teach us...