Saturday, July 25, 2009

The Thank You...

Over the years I've received a few thanks. There are some that really stick out in my mind...you know the ones...where the patient physically comes in after you've advised them and they thank you and make you feel competent and worthwhile. It's those rare rays of sunshine that make you remember why you get up and do what you do every day...those rare rays of sunshine that warm you after the loooooong winters of bitching from other ungrateful patients.

Recently my company changed management. I lost my beloved Old Boss and got one that is not a Pharmacist and whom does not really know what I do. New Boss is not a bad person (...recent events could prove me wrong...we will see...)...New Boss is just in waaaay too deep and should never have been allowed to get the job, let alone apply. That said...I really don't have anyone to impress anymore. Old Boss was like a parent that I wanted to please and receive praise from - New Boss doesn't know what the hell is going on so anything New Boss has to say really doesn't matter to me (...sure, go ahead and tell me I'm doing great, but you don't really know what a great job is so your compliments or constructive criticisms carry no weight...just stay outa my Pharmacy and let me do my job...know what I mean folks!?...).

Last week one of my technicians called me in the middle of my vacation. I expected to hear about some drama that I needed to come in and deal with (...probably Store Management related because as you know "when the cat's away the mice will play"...ignorant dumbasses always meddling with my Pharmacy when I'm not there...)...but what she called to tell me was not expected. She said that everything was fine but that they were really looking forward to me coming back...and that they didn't realize how much I did....DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MUCH I DID...(lemme say that again....)...DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MUCH I DID...

Thank you for that acknowledgement. Thank you for putting me at ease for the rest of my vacation. Thank you for making me feel important and needed. Thank you for compensating for a New Boss's inability to make me feel all that I mentioned above...

To my tech that called me...you know who you are...Thank You...

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

"Oxy-Morons"

Can I tell you how sick I am of people trying to pass forged prescriptions for oxycodone/Oxycontin to me? Here are the rules if you want to trick me:

1) Spell check your work... If you misspell the city, state or clinic name it's sort of a dead giveaway...

2) Don't be greedy... #270 Oxycontin 80mg usually sets off a few bells and whistles...especially when you want to pay cash...

3) Make sure the prescribers phone number is right... Now, I know you know I'm going to call...that's why you set up the phone number with a fake message system that acts like the prescribers office. I didn't go to no fancy school or nuthin' but...COME ON...do you think I don't have a vast prescriber profile with a number that doesn't include the one you're forging for?

4) Stop using the same paper... If I catch one of your forgeries I would recommend that you change the watermark and color of the next ones you try to pass me.

5) Get the DEA number right... Nuf said.

6) Wear clean underwear... I'm going to trap you and have you arrested. The fellow last month got thrown to the cement and his panties were hanging out...tightie-whities were not so whitie...

7) Don't be so friendly at the counter... Schmoozing only works when chocolate is involved...anything else calls attention to you and makes me wonder "what's up".

8) Don't use a prescriber that is no longer practicing... You really are a moron if I have to elaborate on this...

9) ...and finally... Don't call and ask me if it's ready... It will always be ready...and so will security in the store (to detain you), and 911 will be called (to alert them you're coming), and the prescriber will be called (to make sure they press charges)...and, just so you know...I have a detective that I am on a first name basis with because my pharmacy is his main bread and butter (I wish he was hot...but he's not...poo...)... Oh yeah...and I like to tell you that it will be ready at a time when there's a good line of patients waiting so you'll be sure to have an audience (hence number 6...as a courtesy...)...

...there...that should level the playing field a little...

Apologies on Crystal...

I have not called the office yet to see if Crystal the Idiot is still there...but as soon as I return to work next week I'll call...and post ASAP...because enquiring minds want to know!!!