So...I'm checking prescriptions when I notice (out of my peripheral vision) one of my Assistants directing this guy to my consultation window. The second he gets there he starts waving his arms at me and this is how it goes:
IDIOT: "Excuse me" "Hello!?" "Excuse me" "Ma'am?" "Hello!"
ME: "I'll be with you in a moment."
IDIOT: ...shifting from one foot to the next... Then begins waving his arms at me again..."Hello" "Excuse me!"
ME: "I said I'll be with you in a moment" ...now I'm pissed...I hate to be yelled at or interrupted like this...
IDIOT: ...does the unthinkable...KNOCKS ON THE COUNTER and then gives me the "come here finger"....
ME: ...beside myself I round the counter..."What can I help you with?"
IDIOT: "Are you hiring?"
ME: ...in disbelief..."Excuse me?"
IDIOT: "Are you looking for a technician?"
ME: "No"
IDIOT: "So, you're not hiring?"
ME: "No"
IDIOT: "You don't need any technicians?"
ME: "No" ...and then I walk away....
Are you kidding me with that?
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Was that your nipple?
I know it's been hot. Everyone is sweaty and looking for a way to stay cool. Shorts, tank tops, bathing suits...I've seen it all...until Friday....
To the lady who came in wearing a "shortie" blue tye-dyed shortie shirt...thank you for the "peek-boo". Could you please make sure your shirt is longer than your tits next time...or perhaps wear a bra? I thought you had a mole on your belly...good thing I didn't ask if you needed counseling on that...
To the lady who came in wearing a "shortie" blue tye-dyed shortie shirt...thank you for the "peek-boo". Could you please make sure your shirt is longer than your tits next time...or perhaps wear a bra? I thought you had a mole on your belly...good thing I didn't ask if you needed counseling on that...
Saturday, July 25, 2009
The Thank You...
Over the years I've received a few thanks. There are some that really stick out in my mind...you know the ones...where the patient physically comes in after you've advised them and they thank you and make you feel competent and worthwhile. It's those rare rays of sunshine that make you remember why you get up and do what you do every day...those rare rays of sunshine that warm you after the loooooong winters of bitching from other ungrateful patients.
Recently my company changed management. I lost my beloved Old Boss and got one that is not a Pharmacist and whom does not really know what I do. New Boss is not a bad person (...recent events could prove me wrong...we will see...)...New Boss is just in waaaay too deep and should never have been allowed to get the job, let alone apply. That said...I really don't have anyone to impress anymore. Old Boss was like a parent that I wanted to please and receive praise from - New Boss doesn't know what the hell is going on so anything New Boss has to say really doesn't matter to me (...sure, go ahead and tell me I'm doing great, but you don't really know what a great job is so your compliments or constructive criticisms carry no weight...just stay outa my Pharmacy and let me do my job...know what I mean folks!?...).
Last week one of my technicians called me in the middle of my vacation. I expected to hear about some drama that I needed to come in and deal with (...probably Store Management related because as you know "when the cat's away the mice will play"...ignorant dumbasses always meddling with my Pharmacy when I'm not there...)...but what she called to tell me was not expected. She said that everything was fine but that they were really looking forward to me coming back...and that they didn't realize how much I did....DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MUCH I DID...(lemme say that again....)...DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MUCH I DID...
Thank you for that acknowledgement. Thank you for putting me at ease for the rest of my vacation. Thank you for making me feel important and needed. Thank you for compensating for a New Boss's inability to make me feel all that I mentioned above...
To my tech that called me...you know who you are...Thank You...
Recently my company changed management. I lost my beloved Old Boss and got one that is not a Pharmacist and whom does not really know what I do. New Boss is not a bad person (...recent events could prove me wrong...we will see...)...New Boss is just in waaaay too deep and should never have been allowed to get the job, let alone apply. That said...I really don't have anyone to impress anymore. Old Boss was like a parent that I wanted to please and receive praise from - New Boss doesn't know what the hell is going on so anything New Boss has to say really doesn't matter to me (...sure, go ahead and tell me I'm doing great, but you don't really know what a great job is so your compliments or constructive criticisms carry no weight...just stay outa my Pharmacy and let me do my job...know what I mean folks!?...).
Last week one of my technicians called me in the middle of my vacation. I expected to hear about some drama that I needed to come in and deal with (...probably Store Management related because as you know "when the cat's away the mice will play"...ignorant dumbasses always meddling with my Pharmacy when I'm not there...)...but what she called to tell me was not expected. She said that everything was fine but that they were really looking forward to me coming back...and that they didn't realize how much I did....DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MUCH I DID...(lemme say that again....)...DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MUCH I DID...
Thank you for that acknowledgement. Thank you for putting me at ease for the rest of my vacation. Thank you for making me feel important and needed. Thank you for compensating for a New Boss's inability to make me feel all that I mentioned above...
To my tech that called me...you know who you are...Thank You...
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
"Oxy-Morons"
Can I tell you how sick I am of people trying to pass forged prescriptions for oxycodone/Oxycontin to me? Here are the rules if you want to trick me:
1) Spell check your work... If you misspell the city, state or clinic name it's sort of a dead giveaway...
2) Don't be greedy... #270 Oxycontin 80mg usually sets off a few bells and whistles...especially when you want to pay cash...
3) Make sure the prescribers phone number is right... Now, I know you know I'm going to call...that's why you set up the phone number with a fake message system that acts like the prescribers office. I didn't go to no fancy school or nuthin' but...COME ON...do you think I don't have a vast prescriber profile with a number that doesn't include the one you're forging for?
4) Stop using the same paper... If I catch one of your forgeries I would recommend that you change the watermark and color of the next ones you try to pass me.
5) Get the DEA number right... Nuf said.
6) Wear clean underwear... I'm going to trap you and have you arrested. The fellow last month got thrown to the cement and his panties were hanging out...tightie-whities were not so whitie...
7) Don't be so friendly at the counter... Schmoozing only works when chocolate is involved...anything else calls attention to you and makes me wonder "what's up".
8) Don't use a prescriber that is no longer practicing... You really are a moron if I have to elaborate on this...
9) ...and finally... Don't call and ask me if it's ready... It will always be ready...and so will security in the store (to detain you), and 911 will be called (to alert them you're coming), and the prescriber will be called (to make sure they press charges)...and, just so you know...I have a detective that I am on a first name basis with because my pharmacy is his main bread and butter (I wish he was hot...but he's not...poo...)... Oh yeah...and I like to tell you that it will be ready at a time when there's a good line of patients waiting so you'll be sure to have an audience (hence number 6...as a courtesy...)...
...there...that should level the playing field a little...
1) Spell check your work... If you misspell the city, state or clinic name it's sort of a dead giveaway...
2) Don't be greedy... #270 Oxycontin 80mg usually sets off a few bells and whistles...especially when you want to pay cash...
3) Make sure the prescribers phone number is right... Now, I know you know I'm going to call...that's why you set up the phone number with a fake message system that acts like the prescribers office. I didn't go to no fancy school or nuthin' but...COME ON...do you think I don't have a vast prescriber profile with a number that doesn't include the one you're forging for?
4) Stop using the same paper... If I catch one of your forgeries I would recommend that you change the watermark and color of the next ones you try to pass me.
5) Get the DEA number right... Nuf said.
6) Wear clean underwear... I'm going to trap you and have you arrested. The fellow last month got thrown to the cement and his panties were hanging out...tightie-whities were not so whitie...
7) Don't be so friendly at the counter... Schmoozing only works when chocolate is involved...anything else calls attention to you and makes me wonder "what's up".
8) Don't use a prescriber that is no longer practicing... You really are a moron if I have to elaborate on this...
9) ...and finally... Don't call and ask me if it's ready... It will always be ready...and so will security in the store (to detain you), and 911 will be called (to alert them you're coming), and the prescriber will be called (to make sure they press charges)...and, just so you know...I have a detective that I am on a first name basis with because my pharmacy is his main bread and butter (I wish he was hot...but he's not...poo...)... Oh yeah...and I like to tell you that it will be ready at a time when there's a good line of patients waiting so you'll be sure to have an audience (hence number 6...as a courtesy...)...
...there...that should level the playing field a little...
Apologies on Crystal...
I have not called the office yet to see if Crystal the Idiot is still there...but as soon as I return to work next week I'll call...and post ASAP...because enquiring minds want to know!!!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Follow-up on Crystal the Idiot...
So...the patient showed up today and I told him everything. He was shocked and apologized for getting sucked in. Can I just tell you how satisfying it was to tell him the WHOLE story? Finally one of those bitchy Nurses gets her due (sorry to you sweet Nurses out there...I know you're not all bad...).
...and yes, I am calling Monday to see if Crystal is still employed....YATCH.
...and yes, I am calling Monday to see if Crystal is still employed....YATCH.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Totally true...I SWEAR!
Okay...settle in...this is a bit long, but worth the read... If this hadn't happened to me I wouldn't believe it so don't feel bad if you have to comment me and ask..."Are you fucking kidding me?"...
Here goes...
On Friday we had a patient call asking about his medication that was supposed to be called or faxed in to us...he's a new patient. We had nothing on file, sent or called in. He was mad (I know, I know...it's my fault...). About 45 minutes later my tech, Mary (yes that's her name...I wrote it...so ease up when you're reading it Mary...there are lots of people named Mary...it's not like I posted your fingerprint!!), says "There's a rude nurse on the line asking for a Pharmacist". I pick up the line and Mary is right, the nurse is really rude...and PSYCHO! The nurses name is Crystal (yes that's her real name too...). Crystal tells me that my tech is incompetent and so am I and that is why we work where we do...then tells me she's going to give me a prescription for a patient and she wants it filled right and soon because he is going to be there that evening. This is how the rest of our conversations (yes...that is plural...) went:
Me - Don't insult my staff or the company I work for.
Crystal - Just take the prescription - it's for...
Me - (interrupting)...Did you hear what I said?
Crystal - Shut the fuck up and take the prescription you...CLICK (that's me hanging up)
...about 5 minutes later Crystal calls back...I answer (lucky me)...
Crystal - I want to speak to the Store Manager.
Me - (pretending I don't know who she is) I'm sorry, you've reached the Pharmacy and we have dedicated lines...you'll have to call the store.
Crystal - Who is this?
Me - (I give her my name)
Crystal - You hung up on me! I want to speak with the Store Manager!! (yelling)
Me - Yes I did because of your language. You can call the store and speak to the Manager as much as you want but he has no authority in my Pharmacy.
Crystal - Give me the number.
Me - I'm sorry, I don't have that number...but I'm sure you can get it from 411.
Crystal - I'm gonna fucking CLICK (that's me hanging up)
...so...now I'm annoyed (I was entertained a little at first)...and I page the Physician...
...about 2 minutes later I get a call from an Assistant Manager in the store...
Assistant Manager - Hey, I've got some Doctor on line 2 that wants the name and number of your boss.
Me - Really (this must be the Doc I paged...)? Transfer him back.
Assistant Manager - Okay.
Assistant Manager - He doesn't want to talk to you...
Me - I paged him to call me...
...my tech interrupts me to tell me there's a Doctor holding for me...says he was paged...
Me - (to Assistant Manager)...hold on...
Me - (to Doctor holding on our line) How may I help you?
....now it gets juicy...
The Doctor on my Pharmacy line is the one I paged...the person saying he's the Doctor on line 2 in the store is the person Crystal had call in to impersonate the Doctor she works for. YES! I SHIT YOU NOT!!! (...Jerry Springer is coming to mind right about now...). So the real Doctor and I have a little chat...he gets to find out what his nurse has been up to. You can imagine his delight at having someone impersonating him. He apologizes multiple times. I think he was really embarrassed. He tells me that he thinks she has gone home for the day but will address it on Monday immediately. About this time a fax comes through for the patient Crystal was calling me about...hot off the press...so I tell the Doctor "No, I think she is still there because I just received a fax from her for your patient." Now he's really pissed because he had written it that morning... He abruptly ends our call with another apology and thanks saying that he's going to call the back line to his office...
Can I get a poll from you readers? Who thinks Crystal is going to have a job after Monday?
Here goes...
On Friday we had a patient call asking about his medication that was supposed to be called or faxed in to us...he's a new patient. We had nothing on file, sent or called in. He was mad (I know, I know...it's my fault...). About 45 minutes later my tech, Mary (yes that's her name...I wrote it...so ease up when you're reading it Mary...there are lots of people named Mary...it's not like I posted your fingerprint!!), says "There's a rude nurse on the line asking for a Pharmacist". I pick up the line and Mary is right, the nurse is really rude...and PSYCHO! The nurses name is Crystal (yes that's her real name too...). Crystal tells me that my tech is incompetent and so am I and that is why we work where we do...then tells me she's going to give me a prescription for a patient and she wants it filled right and soon because he is going to be there that evening. This is how the rest of our conversations (yes...that is plural...) went:
Me - Don't insult my staff or the company I work for.
Crystal - Just take the prescription - it's for...
Me - (interrupting)...Did you hear what I said?
Crystal - Shut the fuck up and take the prescription you...CLICK (that's me hanging up)
...about 5 minutes later Crystal calls back...I answer (lucky me)...
Crystal - I want to speak to the Store Manager.
Me - (pretending I don't know who she is) I'm sorry, you've reached the Pharmacy and we have dedicated lines...you'll have to call the store.
Crystal - Who is this?
Me - (I give her my name)
Crystal - You hung up on me! I want to speak with the Store Manager!! (yelling)
Me - Yes I did because of your language. You can call the store and speak to the Manager as much as you want but he has no authority in my Pharmacy.
Crystal - Give me the number.
Me - I'm sorry, I don't have that number...but I'm sure you can get it from 411.
Crystal - I'm gonna fucking CLICK (that's me hanging up)
...so...now I'm annoyed (I was entertained a little at first)...and I page the Physician...
...about 2 minutes later I get a call from an Assistant Manager in the store...
Assistant Manager - Hey, I've got some Doctor on line 2 that wants the name and number of your boss.
Me - Really (this must be the Doc I paged...)? Transfer him back.
Assistant Manager - Okay.
Assistant Manager - He doesn't want to talk to you...
Me - I paged him to call me...
...my tech interrupts me to tell me there's a Doctor holding for me...says he was paged...
Me - (to Assistant Manager)...hold on...
Me - (to Doctor holding on our line) How may I help you?
....now it gets juicy...
The Doctor on my Pharmacy line is the one I paged...the person saying he's the Doctor on line 2 in the store is the person Crystal had call in to impersonate the Doctor she works for. YES! I SHIT YOU NOT!!! (...Jerry Springer is coming to mind right about now...). So the real Doctor and I have a little chat...he gets to find out what his nurse has been up to. You can imagine his delight at having someone impersonating him. He apologizes multiple times. I think he was really embarrassed. He tells me that he thinks she has gone home for the day but will address it on Monday immediately. About this time a fax comes through for the patient Crystal was calling me about...hot off the press...so I tell the Doctor "No, I think she is still there because I just received a fax from her for your patient." Now he's really pissed because he had written it that morning... He abruptly ends our call with another apology and thanks saying that he's going to call the back line to his office...
Can I get a poll from you readers? Who thinks Crystal is going to have a job after Monday?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
